Addicted to Love

 In Love, Relationships


You see the signs, but you can’t read. You’re running at a different speed. Your heart beats in double time. Another kiss and you’ll be mine… Might as well face it, you’re addicted to love. – Robert Palmer

Addicted to LoveAddiction can develop with any element, including love. While skeptics may say that you can’t be addicted to love, per se, rather it is the physical, mental, and emotional responses that the addicted become obsessed with. To the person that is experiencing love addiction, it IS love, real love. It is always breathtaking, mind-obsessing, earth shattering, can’t live without it…..love.

Love addiction is not required to be a romantic or sexual relationship. It can take the form of a platonic, or sometimes, idol-like relationship. Friends, mentor, children, parents, lover, or leader are all candidates as the object of affection in an addictive love relationship. At the core, the addict feels like a whole person when engaged in these relationships. Without the love, they find themselves lost and unable to function.

Much like dependency with an illicit substance, the love helps them to feel normal or escape from neurological stressors or emotional pain. Love addicts may exhibit despairing expectations and infinite fears. Often formed in childhood, they fear rejection, agony and unfamiliar experiences. Physiologically, changes occur within the body that can contribute to the addiction. Addicts may become dependent on the feelings of euphoria as the brain releases phenylethylamine causing the love emotions of arousal and excitement. Sustaining a successful healthy relationship is practically impossible for the love addict because they are always looking for the next great love.

Much like other forms of addiction, treatment is available for the people who suffer from love addiction. The first step is admission that there is a problem, and seeking help. The addict will encounter the various stages of grief during the healing process: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Once at the acceptance stage, the addict can begin the learning process about healthy relationships. However, the first healthy relationship that should be established is a loving, caring, authentic love of self. The root cause of the love addiction is the lack of a sense of self, and, as mentioned previously, the need for completion in others. The healthy self-love is essential for healing.

To assist with this healing, this affirmation can be recited to help and said as many times as the person feels compelled to: “I like me for who I am, simply because I am different. I see all the wonderful things that I can share with the people in my life, and people are naturally drawn to this goodness.â€

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